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ATTACKS
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BRIDGE
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SILENT BACKUP
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"Al-Qa'ida . . . you want to blow
up the Coit Tower, go ahead." (–Bill O'Reilly, November 10,
2005)
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—Really evil.
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—They might as well be the same person.
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"I hope you get cancer and die slowly."
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—Really evil.
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—You'll get everything.
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"You don't need that typewriter – Let
me give it to your sister."
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—We'll wait.
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—It all evens out.
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"All right, fair enough."
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—No sweat.
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—So it's coming back.
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"You're selfish."
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—Really evil.
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—Guilt! Dog guilt! ... Stop putting on airs.
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"Don't be so selfish!"
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—Really evil.
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—Living from deal to deal.
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"That's fair enough."
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—No sweat.
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—Will do.
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"Fair enough."
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—All set.
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—Just say no to giving away money.
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"Be fair to yourself."
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—No sweat.
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—Most Buddhists are critical goody-goodies.
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"That's not fair."
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—We'll wait.
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—Too absurd to be believed.
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"That's not fair — I don't like that."
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—Really evil.
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—People are not brought up to respect themselves.
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"What took you so long?"
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—Really evil.
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—Ever waiting.
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"Thank you for being on time."
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—No sweat.
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—It is messy.
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"Can you say thank you?"
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—No sweat.
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—One tea set per group.
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"I don't know — You're the one who has to look
at it."
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—No sweat.
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—That's life in the fast lane.
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"Look! Look! Look!"
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—We'll wait.
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—Run up the middle! Run up the middle!
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"I just saw the soufflé – Look
at that!"
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—We'll wait.
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—Because it bores me – That's the secret of great diets.
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"Look at this! Look at this!"
[Mounted dogs, not being "politically correct"]
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—All set.
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—Man!
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"Don't look at me that way!"
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—No sweat.
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—Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!
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"Don't look at me."
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—No sweat.
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—To hide out . . . to hide out from all the hyperbole
and hullabaloo.
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"Don't look at me when you say that."
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—No sweat.
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—I know — You don't do things like that.
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"Don't give me that look."
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—No sweat.
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—You're doing really good, and I'm going to give you a big raise.
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"Look at me when I'm talking to you!"
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—No sweat.
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—The nicer you are to someone, the more they hate you.
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"remember meeeeeeeee, your brother and salvation?
you fuck."
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—Really evil.
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—Don't lend him any money.
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"Avoid hell. Repent. Trust Jesus today."
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—No sweat.
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—It's the centennial.
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"God, you keep amazing records!"
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—No sweat.
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—A Christian can find a good sign in anything.
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"You really know how to fold clothes!"
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—No sweat.
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—You know, you don't always have to do what the boss tells you to
do.
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"You're so organized."
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—No sweat.
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—It's nice to make mistakes.
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"I don't appreciate your parking your car right
up against mine."
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—No sweat.
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—Most of the people who get good things don't deserve them.
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"It's a brand new car, too."
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—Really evil.
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—The more I look, the more I see how nice life is.
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"I stood right there and watched you do it."
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—No sweat.
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—She's just on the verge of drinking with her eyes.
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"You're here because you were caught."
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—We'll wait.
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—Just because you're happy, you don't have to throw it in my face.
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"You know, Ashley, I don't appreciate that."
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—No sweat.
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—At least it's safe.
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"I don't appreciate that —
I really don't."
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—No sweat.
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—It's an artifact, and I don't take shit from anyone.
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"Thanks — I really appreciate that."
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—All set.
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—Take a bow.
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["The bus went that way!"] "That's for MUNI
only!" [From an angry police officer making everyone, except the
bus, turn right]
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—We'll wait.
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—They're a law unto themselves.
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"THANK YOU . . . YOU ARE VERY KIND."
[Sarcastically, from a police officer]
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—We'll wait.
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—It never hurts to be held back a year.
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"It's going to be a while – I don't like being stared
at."
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—No sweat.
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—Not many people can turn nothing into something.
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"You have trouble with authority figures."
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—No sweat.
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—As if you're not supposed to.
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"Will you turn the overhead light off?" [With
an air of untold grief]
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—No sweat.
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—Is anything okay?
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"The problem is, I don't believe your figures."
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—We'll wait.
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—I'm not sorry I asked, but could we set it aside?
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"Maybe we could live without the wisecracks."
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—We'll wait.
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—It's much better to have something pleasant.
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"Appreciate it."
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—No sweat.
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—Just have some patience.
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«How to understand taxi1010»
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—No sweat.
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—You must have inklings of these things. [Are you frustrated, frustrated,
frustrated by taxi1010.com? Read
Mind Candy. It's
just for you]
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"If you don't understand it, you never will."
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—No sweat.
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—You know, there's a reason when people get some money, they move
out of the slums.
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"You just don't understand."
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—Really evil.
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—For obvious reasons.
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"You'll never understand it."
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—Really evil.
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—Whenever possible go back to root causes.
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"What part of no don't you understand?"
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—No sweat.
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—It was all in my mind.
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"Take good care of him — He's new around
here — Make him feel at home."
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—All set.
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—If I can, I will.
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"How are you folks doing? Okay?"
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—All set.
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—Sooner or later, huh?
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"Taxi101: the orderly
way to be insane." [Link from www.montalk.net]
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—No sweat.
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—Now you see it, . . .
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"I told your boss about you."
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—No sweat.
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—As it is written, so shall it be done.
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"You're the boss."
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—All set.
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—What you do with yourself is up to you.
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"Okay, boss."
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—All set.
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—Pretty uphill.
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09-DEC-1999.
People's belief systems are so different — Actually, when you're
in a new section of the third grade looking for a friend, you're really dealing
with their parents' belief systems, though you don't know it at the time. My
own parents were saying, "Never make friends with Catholics, because they
brainwash their children," and, "The Jews are so nouveau riche —
they spoil their children rotten," and, "Don't ride in the back of
the bus — The colored people don't like that." How was I supposed
to know what all this meant? Brainwashed and spoiled children riding in the
back of the bus? Why, that was me!
Many third graders take their parents' belief systems so seriously, you don't
know what you're dealing with when you meet them, though you know it's pretty
fake. Luckily, we all watched Lassie on TV, so we had something in common. (Except
for the kids who weren't even allowed to watch TV!)
Anyway, back to friends. You can't really make one. You have to find one. That
means you always have to keep the door to your heart open a little, or one can't
creep in.
First there was the word.
And the word became flesh.
12-JUN-2007.
