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Yes. It's true. MY mistake.

 
 

45. Misidentification

 
 
 

I promised Shamaila, the little Pakistani girl next door, I'd buy her a new Frisbee. Someone in the neighborhood had stolen hers. I felt a little betrayed when a clerk in a sporting goods store started berating me when I pointed out the flying disks he was selling weren't actually Frisbees. With my departure, brought about by his strange sales technique, he started howling, as if this were a joke. It helps to find words to replace genuine hurt (—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.) with genuine anger. (—I'm WAY off base.) (–Source: taxi1010.com stargate15)

 

["These aren't Frisbees."] "Oh, you mean, like, Frisbee brand?" [Derisively, scornfully, viciously, from a store clerk attempting to sell expensive knockoffs]
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—I'm WAY off base.

 

"It's not a clinic – It's a dentist's office!"
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Okay! Let's let it go.

 

"Hey, Richard, correct me if I'm wrong."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Did you ever hear the saying, "Between the devil and the deep blue sea ..." —?

 

"Come on! What are you, sleeping?"
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Maybe it also helps you heal.

 

["That's a Boston accent."] "That's extremely unlikely."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—You have to be your own friend, right?

 

"Having you comment on technology is like having Tom Cruise comment on religion. You stretch and distort facts to fit your opinions. Your biases are obvious to any objective person."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—All over the country ... From ocean to ocean ... It's more worthwhile to learn how to be empty on the inside ... Oh, you really are the rational person ... If you fart, you'll be in the shithouse.

 

"I wonder why you created this illness (or experience)."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—I got it from you.

 

"I am offended and furious about your remarks on women in science and mathematics. Arguments of innate gender difference in math are hogwash and indirectly serve to feed the virulent prejudices still alas very alive and now even more so due to your ill-informed remarks." (–Maud Lavin, associate professor at the School of the Art Institute of Chicago, after Harvard president Lawrence H. Summers suggested that innate sex differences may leave women less capable in tenacious pursuit of math and science)
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Or five thousand years of breeding ... So that's no more?

 

"One more comment like that and you won't be getting anything at all."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—I'm just like my father.

 

"Don't test my patience."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—You've got the Blue Ridge blues!

 

"Do you speak for me?"
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—You can say anything you want.

 

"Don't worry about it."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—I'm no worse than you.

 

["When is Ramadan?"] "It's in the spring." [They'd rather make up an answer to appear knowledgeable than tell you they have no idea when it is – It's a form of lying, or misleading at best – it turns out the fast of Ramadan is sometime in September or October]
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Well, sure! I knew that! ... That's the way it is, and no one's going to tell me any better ... (Totally officious ... Worse than me! ... Because what that really is is a panic)

 

"You are letting people do things to you."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—For no reason at all.

 

"You are allowing people to treat you that way."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—A little chilly, huh?

 

"Lighten up. Get a grip. Leave morose silence to teenagers; it's too dramatic for you and me." (–Garrison Keillor)
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—I was experimenting.

 

"Now remove it."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—That's civilization – You hurt yourself to keep from hurting others.

 

"That's a strange combination – computer science and erotic poetry."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Like an overcoat of dreams.

 

"You are single-handedly trying to ruin my poetry."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—All kinds of shit ... Don't lower yourself.

 

"These are fake comebacks."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—Never noticed it, huh?

 

"Stop! Stop! Stop! Pull over! ... You almost killed me!"
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—What a comedown ... I'll have to start declaring them if this keeps up ... You can read what I do ... I'm the world's first evil genius who can't be tricked: I already know I'm going to die.

 

"This is private property."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—They've got everybody coming and going.

 

"They think we're public property."
—Yes. It's true. MY mistake.
—It's good to get along with people.

 
 

 

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